It can be intimidating to engage in dirty discussion. We can almost manage it through text messages, but when we are in person with someone, even someone we love and trust, it can feel embarrassing and awkward.
However, not only in the bedroom but also outside of it, nasty conversation may actually help spice things up or retain the heat. Imagine your lover leaning into your neck during dinner to mumble something explicit or possibly to tease you later at a party.
However, if the thought of doing so makes you uneasy, don’t worry; you’re not the only one. Because more people than ever are looking for “how to talk dirty” and “how to do dirty talk in bed,” we’ve put together this practical mini-guide on how to get over your inhibitions and talk dirty with the best of them.
Keep things simple:
It’s not necessary to go all out and channel your inner porn star; being genuine is much more important than cramming in as many dirty terms as you can. You don’t have to provide a detailed account to begin; you might simply mention how you’re feeling as your partner or another person touches you. Or perhaps how you want them to feel, or how you want to feel when you enter the bedroom. The ultimate aphrodisiac can be as simple as telling someone how much you desire them or find them attractive; it doesn’t require any explicit language or extravagant promises.
Do It By Following Instructions:
You can use dirty words to manipulate your sexual partner into performing the actions you desire. Asking a partner to do something to us or to move so we can do something to them makes us feel more at ease, and this may very easily escalate into talking nasty.
Awareness of Your Vocal Tone:
It’s sometimes not what you say, but how you say it, that matters. Asking a partner to “turn over” doesn’t initially seem to have any suggestive sensual overtones; rather, it sounds more like a snoring husband. However, if you lower and soften your voice, it becomes startlingly provocative. By using a different tone of voice in the bedroom, you may find that you become a little more at ease using dirty language. Sometimes, hearing our everyday voices use language that is highly sexy can feel strange.
First, practice outside of the room:
Try it first outside of the covers if you’re nervous about combining the vulnerability of being nude and in the moment with dirty conversation. At a party, say something sexually provocative to your partner, or even hint at what will happen later over text or email while you’re both at work. It might be far less awkward when you do become hot and steamy if you become comfortable using dirty conversation in your relationship before bringing it up in bed. It also offers you the opportunity to discuss with your partner what works and what doesn’t, which is difficult to do while you’re about to experience an orgasmic moment.
Keep in mind that everyone sees nasty talk differently, and there is no proper way to do it. The most attractive thing you can do with it is to boost your own confidence.